This weekend I rented a car. Friday, my friend Gayle and I decided to do some good old-fashioned adventuring. After weighing various options, we decided to go see the sand dunes at Nitzanim. The following is an actual conversation we had en route, as Gayle was perusing the map to figure out how to get us there.
Me: So, is Nitzanim is north of Ashkenlon or south of Ashkelon?
Gayle: North...wait, let me check that. (Goes back to map). Yes, north.
Me: Ahhh...so out of rocket range then.
Of course, after we got to Nitzanim, and discovered that sand dunes are 1) just that-enormous piles of sand and 2) the sand is really f**ing hot in the sun and 3) hot sand is not particularly fun* to traipse about in while wearing sandals...we ended up ditching Nitzanim and going to Ashkelon anyway where we continued to adventure away. We drove around the city a bit. We marveled at how pretty the houses were and how clean everything was. We drove through one of the more upscale neighborhoods and discussed how much we would love to own one of the houses...if only it did not involve actually having to live in Ashkelon. We eventually found one of the local boardwalks along with a cafe for seaside-brunching. I am using the word "cafe" loosely--the primary product there seemed to be beer. But then, that does add to the element of adventure. There we spent an hour or so eating a breakfast of eggs, bread, salad and 50% fat cheese. Ashkelon does not do low-fat. Nor does it do coffee apart from Turkish, apparently. This was quite a shock, though not as much as a shock as realizing that most of the inhabitants were actually speaking Hebrew, as opposed to English, French or Russian or any of the other languages Gayle and I normally hear in Jerusalem or Tel Aviv, respectively.
But nothing catastrophic happened. Unless you count us each eating an entire loaf of bread apiece and my completely blowing my diet a catastrophe. It might count as one, no?
* As in "I actually burned the soles of my feet" hot. Nu, I am a Tel Avivit. Pave over the damn things already! (Just kidding).