Wednesday, February 25, 2009

A friend is undergoing fertility treatments. Today, she was to pick up the donor sperm. I offered her a lift to the hospital. On the way there, we passed an agricultural school. I (of course) thought it was the hospital and started to turn in there; my friend corrected me and we continued on our way. We then proceeded to have the following exchange:

Friend: I could get goat sperm there.

Me: Cool! Then you could have a freaky goat baby! And you could sell it! And use the money to buy an apartment!

Friend: starts laughing hysterically.

Of course, on the way back from the hospital, Friend kept the container with the donor sperm as far away from me as was humanly possible. I think she was worried that my weirdness DNA might infect the sperm DNA by osmosis. I am no medical doctor, but I am pretty sure that is not how the whole DNA-sharing thing plays out.

Anyway, just thought I would toss that idea out there, in case one of you is looking to take advantage of plummeting real-estate prices, but is short on capital. I do not know how much a goat-human baby would go for, but as one of my co-workers noted, you could probably make a killing on Ebay. Then again, while waiting for Friend at the hospital I saw a woman who I would swear is half-woman and half-fish. I would not pay anything for her. FRIGHTENING!

I ran my cunning plan past another co-worker. Her response: I need a vacation. Crazy woman! What I need is a surrogate mother and some goat sperm. And then I will become a real estate tycoon! Yahahaha! Power and wealth is all within reach!


Rony and Talia said...

You also need a picture of the fish lady.


Sarah said...

I have a comment about today unrelated to your blogging...get your ass out of bed earlier next time so I can ride along behind your lumbering run and yell at you to hussle!!! :)

Hadas L. said...

Lol, that fish lady sounds awesome. Tell me more!